Sometimes comfort is found in the smallest packages

So this weekend was eventful! Friday was a hectic day at work and I spent 90% of the day with a horrible headache that I finally decided was stress related. I came home from work and mellowed out with some music blaring at me through my headphones reminding me that there's someone else out there that feels my pain. There's a quote in the book The Perks of Being a Wallflower that makes me appreciate music, movies, and art in general in a way that also makes me evaluate every moment of my existence.

"Sometimes, I look outside, and I think that a lot of other people have seen this snow before. Just like I think that a lot of other people have read those books before. And listened to those songs. I wonder how they feel tonight."

I think it reminds me that we're all connected. No matter how low I feel, someone else has felt this way before and I think about the fact that they pushed through it. And then I think about all the high moments of my life and how I get the joy of knowing that someone else has felt that happiness before. I think that everything is universal, emotions, thoughts, experiences, etc. It's all just about where they fall into our own lives and how they create the puzzle that makes up who we are. It certainly helps beat away the lonely, empty feelings.

Most days I wish there were a right and wrong answer for everything, but I do enjoy the gray. I think that sometimes we beat ourselves up and hurt ourselves just to remind ourselves that we can feel. And I think that sometimes we lie to ourselves not because the truth is so hard to bear, but because it's easier than admitting that we're wrong.

This weekend I've realized that there is no stronger bond than family. Despite all the thoughtless actions in our lives, family is always there. Up until recently, I was certain that myself and a certain member of my family weren't ever going to bond, but I've realized that it doesn't matter if I'm friends with everyone in my family, what matters is that we're family. And the beautiful part isn't the friendships that we form, but rather that we share something so much deeper than bonds formed over a few weeks our years, we share blood, and the fact that it can create so many different types of people that are there for each other, that's family. That's amazing. I believe that family is God's way of balancing out all the ugliness.

I've got great friends though. And I think that friends are there so you can vent about your crazy family. I really don't think that we hate our family or that we really have to vent about how frustrated they make us. I think that we get so annoyed and so frustrated because we can't understand how people that are so diverse and co-exist in one room without completely killing each other. That's the real miracle of families.

I'm rarely blessed to have such a solid support system, not only from my family, but also from my friends. I've got people on both ends that give me unbiased opinions (as much as it frustrates me sometimes to admit that I'm wrong), but I've got people that are there for me when the decisions get rough and I need advice because I can't seem to navigate myself in the right direction.

I don't think that I give enough credit to the people that are truly there for me. I can only hope that I'm just as helpful to those that are helpful to me. Merci, mon ami.

Another quote from The Perks of Being a Wallflower.

"Please believe that things are good with me, and even when they’re not, they will be soon enough."

But don't hesitate to ask how things are with me. I may not answer right away, but sometimes the comfort of knowing someone is there to ask and to talk to certainly provides quite a bit of happiness.

I don't realize until later how much the little moments last.

A goal to add to the list:
- Pay attention more.